ryou's secret
by yami ruri
Summary: I suck at summaries...so...OOwell it rxb.it may have more pairings latter but as for now its just them.


me:ok....I need to say this.  
this fic came to me.I don't know how but by the time that I noticed that my fingers were on the keyboard,I had all of this done.  
so....I figured I could post it (I'm just wondering if it makes any sence)  
btw.....umm...koi....if you read this before I get to talk to you...then,gomen nasai.....it's really the hurrican's fault not mine (and to think,theres one more coming this way VV),hope your ok.....aishiteru  
oh.....before the fic starts....the first part is what ryou is telling himself.....so,yeah....VV it makes no sence  
  
ryou's secret  
  
why?  
thats the only thing that makes sence in my mind  
the answers are irrational  
thus,the only thing that makes sence inside is to ask "why?"  
  
waking up with a sence of loss and guilt. yes it was another one of those nights. alone,empty,cold,unrealistic there were many things that could be said,many were unwanted. the storm outside was as it had been all day long. ragging,annoying at times.  
getting up with a tire body and even more tire eyes that were pleading for more sleep,the owner made no attempt to please his own body's plead as he walked torwards his drawer. the handles were cold but in his semi-concious state of mind,he didn't notice much. for him it was all a dream.the days,the nights,the fights,everything.  
nothing in his life made sence anymore and the only outlet for his anger and frustration he had left were his trusted knives.  
as he opened the drawer,he took out one of the many knives he had that no one knew about,he lifted the sleeve of his shirt just high enough for his purpose to be fufilled.  
  
waking up one more time,he found his body out of bed.  
for some reason his arm was in pain,it had a burning sensation that he had become familiar with over the years. he paid no attention to it,as he started to remember the reason why it was like that,'another one'was the only thaught he had as he rubbed the area were the wound was.  
the only thing that he thaugh of was suicide on the past few days. afraid of being caught and put into a psychological institute,he keeped the cuts at a safe level above his wrist.  
he wanted to die but he couldn't,he had a reason for being alive. no one knew his reason but he had one,the only thing that keeped him from death was a boy,he resembled him in many ways than one in physical terms yet they were quite different in so many ways.it was amusing to him,the way his yami was at times.  
neither one of them had the curage to admit they're love for the other yet everyone else saw it but them. they shared one thing in common asides the physical resemblens and the way they felt torwards each other,it was the fact that both of them cut themselves yet neither had noticed that the other did so.  
the cuts of the boy always deepened in winter times,it was so easy to hide them from his "lover" as he called him in his mind. since neither one of them had a physical contact,neither noticed the other's action.  
the boy raised his sleeve to see how much damage he had done to himself this time,'amazing',he stared at it for a long time until he heard a knock on the door. his partner no doubt. he quickly pull the sleeve down and attended to the door to be greated by a less than happy bakura.  
"hello bakura",ryou's words came rather monotonous yet he managed to smile,"hello"the reply was usually the same every morning,cold and distant and this one was no difference.  
"what brings you here?"seeing as he wasn't usually visited by his dark self,he couldn't help but ask the question but as soon as it left his mouth he mentally slaped himself for being so cold.  
"I came to return this",as he finished his sentence bakura took out something from his pocket,much to ryou's surprisse it was one of his knives,'how could I have been so careless?!?!,I've never let anyone know that I have knives not even my fathers knows',dumbfounded,the only thing that ryou could do was to stare with a look of shock and anticipation of the talk thatw as sure to follow but much to his surprisse,the "talk" never came.  
"are going to take it or do I get to keep it?!"at bakura's comment,ryou snapped awake,"th-thanks you....bakura"he took it,not wanting to know how it had landed in his secret lover's hands.  
he closed the door behind him and locked it rapidly. staring at the knife that was now in his hands,he remembered why he hadn't killed himself last night,why he had cut himself as well and also why he had to be more carefull with his "collection",as he called them.

me:well thats it for now....hope it made some sence and hope it was ok VV the effect of my coffe has left my body and right now I'm tire and in need of another cup,thank RA we have...um..never mind,might not be a good idea to mention well,while I go and make more coffe rememeber to r&r


End file.
